Thursday Morning Gross Effect

I saw this story on HLN this morning and it made me completely nosh.

Ed Thomas, an Iowa high school football coach and 2005 NFL High School Football Coach of the Year was shot and killed on Wednesday by a former student of his... INSIDE the weight room at the school, just before 8 AM.

Apparently there were students in the weight room with the coach at the time. How disturbing.

The shooter, Mark Becker, the 24-year-old who had played football for Thomas was apparently supposed to be in a psychiatric ward after being arrested several days prior.

ESPN has a great article, click here to read more.

This is one of those things that makes you think... life is short, don't take your . RIP Coach.

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In other tragic news, have you heard about Neda, the young philosophy student who was shot while walking past a protest in Iran?

Yet another story I saw on the news and immediately wanted to vom. Here's an article on that. The video footage is online somewhere, I just can't bring myself to look at it.

Poser-ville

Last week, I went to the beach. While I was there, I noticed some random old dudes snapping pictures. They were more than likely amateur paparazzi.... (the recession).

Naturally, I figured they were snapping photos of my body to photoshop a celebrities face into.

But then....... I opened up US Weekly today and saw this:

Yeah, that's just Miley and Nick (Jonas, not Lachey).

They're what we like to call "jet skiing".... on Tybee Island. AKA - My old territory.

Back in the hott nanny days, I was a huge fan of Miley. Mostly because her show was the only one that didn't make me want to vom when the kids would watch the disney channel (sorry Raven).

But now... she's been getting on my straight nizz-erves.
I mean, first of all, I used to be at Tybee Island like... ev-er-ee DAY.

And now... she has her nose pierced. How Kelly Clarkson of you, Miley.


Whatever. If I would have known she would be there, we would be instant BFF's right now. Instant.

So. Yeah. I guess those old dudes weren't just being creeps.

A Simple Math Equation

Take a few jolly Mexicans,

+

A nice pile of Cocaine,

+

A ferocious shark,

+

Your everyday Laser Sword,

=

TOTALLY SCREWED.

Clever, though.

Here's the article.

Summer 2009 HOTT - NESS

The Official SHAIKENS HOTT LIST.

(OOOOUCH!)

THINGS TO DO:

Six Flags
Go to Amelia Island
Blog for once
Go to St. Simons Island
Return to Nannytown
Read 2 books
Braves games
Go down the river
Make new beats on my Yamaha
Go to Philly
Play tennis
Go to New Orleans
Get super tan
Tons of board games
Boxing
Perfect my basketball skills
Complete crossword puzzles without the internet
Climb Stone Mtn
Vegas trip

THINGS TO WATCH:

Weeds
Nurse Jackie
True Blood
Away We Go
Paris Hilton's My New BFF
Dexter

Yeah. Cool.

They Call Me The Hunter.

Some of you may know that my birthday was a week-ish ago. Some of you also may know that there's this one thing I've been asking for since last year.

Well. Thanks to my good friend here,
(who also happens to look like Wolverine)

...I got this masterpiece of goodness:

So naturally, my first instinct was...
"Finally! My wolf shirt is going to bring all the boys to my yard!"

True or false? FALSE.

Apparently, I got the wrong one. According to d-listed, dudes everywhere are buying this shirt to attract the ladies.

So I've been thinking that maybe I've been going about this all wrong. You know, the t-shirt thing. Maybe I need something... more subtle.

Fannypack?

Anyway, speaking of creativity thieves, CNBC is doing a special called... get this...

The Oprah Effect.

Nice. Way to steal my name, jerks.

I just can't win, can I.

In other news, Paris Hilton's My New BFF is back with an all new, totally predictable season... Guaranteed to make you really hate yourself for watching it.